Dating…it’s so silly

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Recently one of my sweet sorority sisters has been sharing the terrors of online dating via her IG story. While it is entertaining and her commentary is the best I can’t help thinking how online dating is such a joke. Yes, I know people find their true loves this way, but this takes a lot of time and energy to do so.

I know we laugh at the Bachelor franchise when the comments of he/she is not here for the right reasons, but most on the dating apps are in that same group.

Then when you do find someone online or anywhere for that matter, who seems like a normal person and could have potential you have to overcome baggage.

Baggage can come in many forms. Mine is the divorce and feeling like I failed at marriage/ relationship.

Getting back in the dating world I’ve been so reserved in showing who I truly am for fear that I will run others off. I have over analyzed every interaction hoping I didn’t come across a certain way.

My fear has created insecurities that I have not had before and ones I thought I had overcome. Sharing my thoughts and feelings has not come easy.

Some baggage is so heavy that the person is jaded. When you become jaded the likelihood that you are ready for a relationship is slim regardless of what you say. Mindset is key here as the person needs to let go of past anger and heartbreak to allow others in. Assuming everyone is going to hurt you is not fair and shows how emotionally unavailable you are.

In relationships you take on some of your significant other’s baggage. Taking on baggage does not mean you have to let it weigh you down. One can be supportive and understanding without taking on all the stress, it’s all about mindset and boundaries.

To my friends out there balancing the dating world and those in a relationship I have a few thoughts based on my experiences.

1. Accept the impact of past relationships, but do not dwell. Take the lessons and grow from the experience.

2. Know change is constant and you need self reflection. You need self reflection to be the best you can be for yourself and your partner.

3. Set your boundaries and communicate them. Setting expectations on how you can be supportive, areas that are challenging for you as well as several other aspects will help prevent frustration.

Good luck and keep discovering who you are. Find someone who pushes you to be the best you can be and will be there to catch you when you fall.

XOXO,

Cecee

Photo Credit: Rachel

What’s Past the Horizon…

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I have been missing from my blog for a while. I feel as I have dropped the ball on all aspects of life lately and very overwhelmed. I am usually a very optimistic person and often think about the future with great possibilities. Lately a lot of change is happening all at once and I am having a hard time staying positive and being happy in the moments.

Seeing past the horizon and seeing change as a positive is usually easy for me as I set a plan to prepare.Currently I feel like I have no plans and it creates extreme anxiety for me, which I have never experienced before.

Reasons I feel overwhelmed…

  • I have been going back and forth with selling my house and no clue where I will move to if I do.
  • My work territory has expanded. Positive is I will have more opportunity, which I am excited about. I am stressed due to timing with figuring out about selling and moving at the same time as expanding my territory .
  • Friends/Family that I usually see often are busy. I feel like this stage of life is weird with friends being at various stages of life and keeping in touch is hard.
  • Feeling like I am letting myself down as well as others. I am not good enough.

I am not writing this for sympathy or empathy it is more for an apology to my friends and family who I know are going through some struggles and I am sorry I don’t have the energy to be there for you like I want to. I apologize for causing stress and anxiety for others while I have been trying to battle my own.

I know everyone is faced with their own battles and we don’t always see or know what they are. Be kind to everyone you interact with as you don’t know the impact you are making on that person.

Sending prayers, warm wishes and love!

XOXO,

Cecee

Taking Steps Towards Transformation

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As much as anyone hates to admit that they let their self go I have to admit that is what I did. Everyone copes with stress and emotions differently. I have never been the girl who stops eating, rather the opposite.

Last year to cope with stress and overwhelming sadness I turned to fatty foods and lots of booze. In the course of a year I gained 25 lbs, 12 lbs of that I packed on in 4 months. Finally in March I had decided I need to regain control of my health. I needed to change my lifestyle back to one that I completely ignored for a while.

Originally the big push was to fit in a dress that I purchased to wear to my friend JoJo’s wedding. Sadly I had gained 12lbs after I purchased the dress and needed to drop within 8 weeks to fit in the dress.

I reached out to my friend Ally Vaeth to help me get back on track. Ally is a health and fitness coach that is highly motivated and inspiring individual. I signed up for her monthly program that includes workouts, meals and amazing support. I would check in with her on a weekly basis and we would adjust my program as needed. Ally’s Instagram  provides examples of workout moves that were listed on my workouts for times I needed an explanation. She also is great to chat through any questions I’ve had for my workouts or meals.

With the help of Ally’s program, meal prep and workout buddy’s I was able to acheive my first goal of fitting in my dress! I lost 10 lbs in that time even with going on a vacation to Austin and doing lots of work travel.  The dress was actually big on me!

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My goal is more than just fitting in this dress. My goal is to continue and drop body fat. While on vacation in Virginia I was mindful of my goal and tried to only have a few cheat meals while still getting my workouts in.

Luckily my friends were very supportive while visiting.  JoJo, Jayne and Danielle all got workouts in with me in and outside of the gym!

I was focused knowing I was going to be in Vegas for a Bachelorette two weeks after my Virginia trip and wanted to look good in my swimsuit.

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Staying on track during vacations and traveling for work is very difficult and requires lots of planning and being very mindful. The hardest part is keeping a positive and focused mindset as life gets hectic! Ally was great in talking through the stress and recommending podcast or books to help. I also have strong support and motivation from others. I know without them I would have struggled to stay on track.

In 12 weeks I have made strong progress. Now without big events to keep me motivated I am trying to not let the chaos of everyday stresses take over and keep my health and fitness a top priority.

My overall goal is to be around 148 lbs and in the 20-22% body fat range. I am 5’6.5 . In 12 weeks I am down 13.6 lbs and 7.3% body fat with an overall muscle gain of 3 lbs.  The stats are listed below the image.

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Left: March 5th 170lbs, 32.9% Body Fat Right: June 3rd, 156.4 , 25.6% Body Fat

Please note this may include affiliate links. Please visit my disclosure page for more information. 

If you are looking to jumpstart your fitness I highly recommend reaching out to Ally either by her Instagram or her website. She has several different packages she can customize to your needs. Let her know I referred you!

Also invest in cutting board, veggie spiralizer, lunch box food scale, measuring cups and spoons! 

Keep moving, stay focused and take back your health!

XOXO,

Cecee

 

 

Packing for a Plan

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While traveling keeping up with a fitness/macro plan can be a challenge. I plan to enjoy some of my favorite foods and beverages on vacation, but not to go overboard on my indulgence. In order not to go overboard I need to be prepared with a plan and pack accordingly.

I love my Nike workout gear! I have my workout clothes, running shoes and Converse for leg day all packed. I have already determined days I have access to a gym and ready to do my workouts from my coach, Ally.  The bride, JoJo and I will be hitting up the gym for a strong workout prior to wedding prep fun! There are days that I do not know if I can make it to a gym and for those days I have packed my Sports Research bands and have HIIT workouts planned.

My goal is to get at least 30 minutes of cardio each day on vacation. Luckily Richmond and Virginia Beach are such walkable cities that this goal will be easy to meet! In VB I already have a plan to tackle Mount Trashmore stairs and fitness stations with my girl, Danielle.

Meeting macros will be my biggest challenge on vacation. In efforts to stay on track I have packed my food scale, blender bottlequest protein powder packs, quest protein bars and drink mix for a low calorie cocktail. I have also packed my vitamins for each day. I will stop at a grocery store to get more items for some of my meals and will focus on making smart choices at restaurants. Typically I only do one cheat meal a week, but on vacation one cheat meal per day without being extreme is my plan.  I can’t miss out on some of my favorite restaurants and trying out some new spots!

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Will power, please don’t fail the plan! Time to stay strong and focused, bikini season is around the corner!

Also the dash to fit in the dress was a big success, as it is actually a little big on me now! Post to follow on fitness progress.

If you have any other travel tips for staying on track with macros during vacation please comment below.

XOXO,

Cecee

 

 

Oh Cecilia 

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You’re breaking my heart you’re shaking my confidence daily…

Great song that I often hear and the words “shaking my confidence daily” stand out. I know what I’m about to discuss has nothing to do with what the song is actually about, but it’s so fitting.

This week we celebrated International Women’s Day. My social media was flooded with positive love for fellow women while my personal inbox was attacked. This had me reflect on all the times that by simply being me, I had shaken someone’s confidence.

In high school, there is always drama. For some, that dramatic mindset never goes away. Most of the high school drama is petty and based on feelings due to poor communication, disrespect and misguided finger pointing, or possibly hormones 🤷🏼‍♀️.

As we become adults we learn to respect others from differing backgrounds and mindsets creating the opportunity to grow and learn. Sadly some are not so accepting and you can easily shake their confidence.

Then there are times in your career when based on your age and tenure with a company “you are not supposed to have that position yet, you didn’t slowly move up the ranks”.

I am Cecilia. My own confidence has shaken the confidence of others, both male and female.

I often reflect on the experiences that have shaped me and the tough, negative experiences have made me strong, resilient and overly ambitious. Those tough moments and feelings I do not wish on anyone.

The moments of love, respect , compassion and support shaped me as well and frankly those moments are the most cherished.

Showing respect and compassion while someone is yelling at you and calling you horrible names is beyond difficult, and yes, sometimes I’ve failed and snapped back. Taking the high road can be a challenge, but will provide you more peace than fighting back. I have continuously learned you cannot rationalize with the irrational, no matter the effort you put in.

Having a positive mindset, staying calm in difficult situations and not letting someone shake your confidence is hard. Regardless of the situation you find yourself in, the only thing you can control is how you react.

Life is tough and everyone has their challenges, but showing respect and compassion can make a big difference. The difference may not be how the other person handles the situation, but may just provide peace for yourself knowing you were the bigger person.

XOXO,

Cecee

 

Intentional, Incredible, Inspired…

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This past weekend I attended the Arnold Sports Festival for the 2nd year in a row. This year just like last I gained more than just free products and samples. Being around all the athletes and fitness enthusiasts I am always inspired not only by their physique, but by their mental game and dedication.

Most people look at these athletes and only see their physique and physical strength, but do not understand how intentional they must make each day. These athletes have so much dedication to stay focused on strict meal and workout plans. The plans they follow are down to a science and very structured.

Life is hectic and one can easily fall off track without a strong mental game. As of late my head has not been in the game and motivation has been lacking. I have a decent understanding of what I need to do to get my fitness goals back on track, but need the push!

Last time I fell off track I needed to fit into a dress for a wedding… sadly enough I am in the same boat again a year and a half later. In 2016 I worked with my girl, Ally Vaeth  to fit in a dress for a NYE wedding. Following a meal plan through Thanksgiving and Christmas was tough, but necessary to hit my goal. With the help of Ally and dedication to the plan she created I was able to fit in my dress below!

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I have reached out to Ally again to help me get back on track and hopefully remain consistent in the future.  Ally is so detailed in her plan and genuinely cares about your success. When we met to go over how this program would be set up she made a comment about being intentional each day. This really stayed with me as the days I don’t have a plan are the days I easily skip the gym and have fast food. My schedule is different everyday and changes each week, so a set routine is hard to develop. I need to intentionally include my fitness and meal plans in my weekly to do list.

My before pictures this time around are so embarrassing for me and I am not ready to share until some progress is made. Stay tuned as Ally helps kick my butt back in shape!

Here is the goal dress I bought in September (pic is from September) and sadly have gained 10 lbs since. Operation fit in dress in process!

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XOXO,

Cecee

 

Thirty, flirty and thriving

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Did you watch 13 going on 30 with Jennifer Garner? Early on in the movie 13 year old Jennifer (can’t recall the character name) has a famous plea to be thirty, flirty and thriving. Suddenly I am 30, embracing being flirty and thriving!

I will turn 30 this week and my life has taken a turn from what I had envisioned and that is ok. This is 30, a new decade and new adventures.

This year will be full of travel, new experiences and treating myself! I have worked hard for what I have and I am proud of my accomplishments, which is why I am taking this year to spoil and rediscover myself!

The emotional impact and hit to my self-esteem from a divorce was devastating. I needed to pull myself out of the slump. A less conventional  way to see myself in a beautiful, strong and confident way was through a boudoir photo shoot.  I have had boudoir photo shoots before, but this shoot was different. This shoot was solely for me and a start of my self discovery.

Rachel Anne  posted about a special on her  facebook page on one of the days I was really struggling and I reached out to her to book that day.  I had planned on doing a This is 30 shoot, so we went ahead with the birthday shoot even though it was August.

I knew from working with Rachel in the past that just getting my hair and make-up done by her would instantly make me feel better. Rachel was fantastic in listening to me and truly understanding my insecurities, which her images helped me see past and see myself. I saw myself for the strong, independent, confident, and beautiful soul that I am.

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Working with Rachel is empowering and uplifting. This shoot was a step towards knowing it is ok that my plan didn’t work out and I am going to be ok.  Boudoir images will help you see yourself in a fun and flirty light, which I really needed now that I am out in the scary dating world!

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The new fun plan is to celebrate my 30th birthday to the fullest! I have started by celebrating with one of my best friends/Big, who also happens to turn 30 this week! We started the kick-off of birthday week with a fun shopping spree. I really took treat yo self to heart with new clothes, makeup and an iconic piece of jewelry for an iconic birthday.

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My dad has a birthday this week as well! I missed being born on his birthday by an hour, so for the past 30 years we always celebrate our birthday together. Yesterday we celebrated our birthdays with more shopping and lunch together in Bloomington. This shopping trip Pippa made out like a bandit with new toys and treats!  We will celebrate our birthdays again this summer with a fishing trip. We are all about summer fishing vs ice fishing, which is why it is a delayed gift.

This week I am looking forward to celebrating by getting a massage, revamping my hair, lunch dates with friends, my birthday party at The Cake Bake Shop and traveling to San Diego!  Happy dirty 30 to me!

A recap of my birthday week and vacation will occur next week, so stay tuned!

XOXO,

Cecee