From We to Me to Swiping

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Since tomorrow is Valentine’s Day I thought sharing about the crazy dating world was fitting. So dating apps… Tinder, Bumble, Hinge etc did not exist the last time I was single,  practically 7years ago 😳 . Dating apps have changed the dating game and it is mind-boggling!

I know there are people out there who have found their soulmates on these types of apps, but based on my experiences so far those people must be so patient.

If you ever had those thoughts of wondering what you missed out on with the dating apps or you are looking to live through your single friends, here are a few stories as to why it is mind-boggling!

The moves of guys on these apps are in extremes of unsolicited dick pics to let’s be exclusive after a week of texting ! Seriously why do you need to respond with a dick pic and the message “think you can handle it” to my question hi! How are you? Oh so you’re literally just a dick haha. 🙈

I do appreciate the ones that respond to the hi! How are you question with “look I’m just here to hook up so if you aren’t into that go ahead and unmatch”. Done, unmatched! I definitely did not indicate DTF on my profile anywhere.

I’m not looking to jump into my next relationship either! One guy after a week of texting and 1 meeting wanted to be exclusive and only invest in me if I could commit on the spot to seeing it working long term.  You do not know someone enough in a week to decide, it takes time! For me to decide I want to see someone more than just a first date is surprising and rare in this swiping world.

Another guy expected responses immediately and if no reply within the hour would send multiple question marks or say Cecee,  hello? … This is a recipe to be unmatched quickly.

Hiding behind these apps people tend to be more bold and interesting than they are in person. You can carefully orchestrate a response when behind a screen, but the truth of being compatible is in the face to face interactions.

I did have one date that after meeting him I quickly had bad vibes and feel like he would easily take advantage of someone. This is why dating safety and public spaces is key. I will have another blog post about dating safety.

I know you have heard the term of ghosting, but more common problems I have faced are breadcrumbing and cushioning.  This topic deserves its own blog post, which will follow.

I have been told about the dating game and friends have tried to give me advice on how to play the game. The truth of the matter is I hate that it is a game and I tend to live by my own rules. The hardest part about dating is blocking out the noise, listening to yourself and being vulnerable.

I will enjoy Valenwine with a Galentine tomorrow and wishing everyone else a Happy Valentine’s Day!

XOXO,

Cecee

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